Get with the Program
The Swift Manifesto, or HOW TO FLY FISH AND NOT MAKE US ALL LOOK BAD
(this was posted on our blog a long time ago, some found it quite offensive - so we've updated it and are adopting it as our manifesto)
- Stop holding that rod butt in your teeth - you look like an idiot.
- Fly fishing is not an extreme sport - if you somehow think it is, you need to get a life or get out more (probably both)
- Welded loops are for little kids - learn to tie a nail knot. (Ok, they can be handy in the salt)
- Loose that ‘grin n grip’ - Holding your fish out at the camera is just a projection of your extremely small penis. The 'grin n grip' while holding the rod in your teeth clearly states "Idiot with Small Penis"
- Pictures of fish in the water are extremely cool.
- Nothing will make you look like more of a doofus than being all gear and no cast. Work on your fly casting - it will do more for your fly fishing than anything else you could do.
- Stop being a tight arse and buy some decent gear - start at the pointy end and work back.
- A stiff rod will not make you a better caster.
- An expensive rod will not make you a better caster.
- My fly line will not make you a better caster.
- A lesson will make you a better caster.
- My fly casting DVD’s will make you a better caster.
- Practice will make you a better caster.
- A Gin and Tonic will make you feel like you are a better caster.
- Fast and stiff describe two different things - learn ‘em.
- Understand what a standard weight forward line is and that it is ABSOLUTELY USELESS for casting distance.
- "Todays modern fast action rods” Do not need a line that is half a line weight heavier in order to load the rod.
- The correct advertising blurb for “weight and a half lines” should be “Buy this line, it will make you seem like a better caster than you actually are”
"Buy this line, it will make our ridiculously stiff fly rod actually bend"
- The secret to fly casting is knowing how to bend the fly rod correctly. Honestly
- Be aware that weight and a half lines are for little kids. You’re a big kid and are being fed marketing crap - you’re better than that.
- "Designed in (insert country here)" - means made in China.
- If we all put as much effort into actually looking after the places we fish that we put into talking about our sport, the world would be in much better shape. Please, don't just be a talker - Have some balls, be a doer.